SERIES STORY TELLING – IT’S ALL ABOUT THE SUBTEXT

Subtext can be found beneath words, gestures, behaviours, actions, and images…..

I like being connected and associated with Series and Soaps; for this is where I earned my stripes as it were – my television story telling credentials – but as a script consultant with my own burgeoning business, http://www.scriptadvice.co.uk I often find that writers believe this discipline of television writing has a limited and restricted skill base.

I can get quite stroppy, dear reader; if I read/hear/over hear/ someone denouncing the story telling quality of our well known Soaps and Series; currently churning out consistently high quality storylines on a stupidly fast turn around on ITV, BBC and C4 and watched by millions, across the widest ranging demographic of any drama genre.

You see, it is here, in the fast moving, story eating, mercilessly time consuming, world of Series and Soap story creation that all areas of story telling are consistently and relentlessly called into play.

Text. Subtext. Message. The Royal Three. Each needs to be at the table, for an episode of drama, for a script of anything, to work.

Text needs to propose to Subtext, and Message dances at the wedding.

Plot is the first concern – what happens. But it is not Text that in the final analysis is, in my view, the most important element of this story triumvirate.

It is the Subtext.

For it is here that we can divert attention from that which is obvious. We can set an angled story path towards that which is not said. We can focus the audience collective mind away from the obvious, the stated, the expected.

Naturally, we need plot. We need action. We need Stuff To Happen.

But. Without a reason (ideally several) for this action, without a driving force underlying this course of behaviour, without a layered and well conceived series of motivations, desires and
dreams, the characters in this story world are mere cyphers for the plot. They are two dimensional – the impact they will make on screen will be as dynamic and forceful as a card board cut out falling face down. No one will care. The impact will not be felt.

It’s a subtle art; the weaving of subtext through a narrative.

Writers need to be aware; like the elephant in the room, of that which is purposefully left un-mentioned; that which acts as an undercurrent, a tug of motive; the idea that plants itself in the mind of the viewer as we watch the scene unfold. What is this scene about? There’s the plot to tell us that, but now this particular beat has been duly reached, now what is the scene really about?

In Last Tango In Halifax Series 3; Sally Wainwright gives us a master class in how to handle subtext in a two hander scene involving Gillian (Alan’s daughter) and Gary, her ‘date’ for the evening. Alan and Celia (the elderly lovers who caused so much unrest and upheaval in their respective families in series 1 by falling in love and marrying) remark how unusual it is for Alan’s hard-edged, capable daughter Gillian to have a romantic liaison of any description. Alan makes a point of saying how Gary’s invitation to dinner came out of the blue for Gillian. How it appears odd that any man would do this, (the suggestion being that it is a cynical world in which we live and Gillian is more cynical than most). Caroline, Celia’s driven, educated daughter with lesbian ambitions, also seems to find the prospect of Gillian’s upcoming date amusing.

And it is the thoughts and attitudes of these three members of Gillian’s family that carry us forward into the actual scene where Gillian meets Gary at the restaurant. We believe their incredulity is all there is to play here. We look forward to Gillian being finally romanced. It is about time. Which is what Sally Wainwright wants us to think. Until.

Two things happen very quickly.

One. Gary is late. Not a good sign. Subtly the seeds of doubt are planted.
Two. When he does appear; Gary’s demeanour is more platonic than romantic. He scoots over his lateness and Gillian is a good sport about it. He is clearly perturbed by something. And we feel the disappointment bubbling under the surface, as the camera favours Gillian.

Gary is determined to tell a labyrinthine story about his family. He talks about himself. Not the done thing on a date. This much, we all know. So we begin to realise this is not a standard scene about two singletons pairing up.

The tug of the subtext is clearly felt. What is about to happen? What is Gary all about?

So Gary, inevitably, (because now we know this scene is about so much more than was originally supposed) drops the bombshell. He believes Gillian’s dad Alan is his real father.

So this is why we are having dinner? Gillian’s face is a mask. Yes. Sorry. Did I give the wrong impression? Yes. You did rather.

Now, Alan’s almost childlike delight that his daughter is to be wined and dined; and Caroline’s wry smile as she tells her girlfriend that Gillian is on a date, and Celia’s raised eyebrow, all now takes on a deeper, shade and it is also now, that in retrospect we can see how the writer began weaving the subtext which currently courses through this dinner scene, 3 or 4 scenes previously.

The colour of dramatic subtext taints not just the essential scene in which it must be most deeply felt – it also adds a tonal wash to preceding scenes.

Here’s my book. It does what it says on the tin. Enjoy.

Need television scripting help? Here’s my writer’s group https://www.facebook.com/groups/237330119115/
And here I am on Twitter https://twitter.com/YVONNEGRACE1

Happy Writing!

CONVERSATIONS WITH A STORY TELLER

Canadian J Lynn Stapleton is a writer, photographer and Geriatric Care Nurse who follows me on Twitter. She also loves to blog and interview when she can. Here is her recent interview with her friend, the American tv writer Jill Lorie Hurst.

‘Guiding Light’ was the world’s longest running soap opera until it was axed in 2009.  Jill, like so many television writers, learnt her trade and honed her craft on the show. I have EastEnders to thank for my baptism of fire.  So here, in solidarity, I post Lynn’s interview.

I particularly like what Jill says about the collaborative process of television series writing.  Thanks Lynn for a great interview and insight into the working life of a talented writer and also for allowing me to share it here.

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In the several months previous to the American soap opera, Guiding Light, being cancelled and subsequently going off the air, I made friends with numerous other fans of the show, resulting in meeting in a large fan gathering in New York City to celebrate the final official fan club luncheon with the cast. It would also be the start of a wonderful friendship with one of the head writers of the series very soon after.

Holding various positions within the Guiding Light family from Assistant to the Writers, Scriptwriter, Assistant Head Writer, Story Producer and Co-Head-Writer, Jill Lorie Hurst has won a Daytime Emmy Award for Best Writing (2007), and a Writer’s Guild of America Award for Best Writing (2004), along with several nominations in both awards ceremonies over the years.

Over the past few years, we’ve talked on-line and in person about just about anything that strikes our interest, from soaps, to photography, to life in general. For a long time, I’d felt a bit odd asking a friend for an official interview, primarily about scriptwriting, but decided just to go with it and I’m glad I did.

Lynn: What got you interested in working in television as a writer when you were starting out?

Jill: I never thought about television writing until I started working at the front desk at the studio where Guiding Light was taped. You get to know about people when you wait tables or work at a front desk. The quality of people and storytelling at GL made me want to stay forever! I’d grown up writing, loved theater and I watched the [Proctor & Gamble] P&G soaps, but had no career plan. I left college in 1982 and moved from Detroit to New York City. I waitressed for 10 years and my life was pretty full. Full of theater going, travel and friends. And it was the 80’s – NYC was crackly and crime filled. A number of good friends were dying of AIDS. There was a lot going on, but I loved the restaurant, my co-workers, the customers. Luckily, one of my customers, Grace Bavaro, loved me enough to send me across town for a tour of the GL studio. A year later I started working part time at the front desk. I was in my early 30’s then. I didn’t officially join the show til I was almost 35, and I was close to 40 when I became a staff writer! A late bloomer by TV standards. I never thought of myself as a WRITER. I just wanted to be there and be part of the storytelling process and help put out the “product” on a day to day basis. If the environment at GL hadn’t been so amazing, I might’ve gone back to the restaurant business. I like working with good people, doing work I care about. Thanks to the generosity of some terrific people I got the chance to do that at Guiding Light for many years.

Lynn: When you look for inspiration for stories or dialogue, what are things that grab your interest/attention?

Jill: I’m not a big picture story teller – I tend to think in scenes and characters. I am inspired by people I see on the street, conversations I listen to on the bus, looking in windows as people live their lives. My husband, friends and family inspire me. Sometimes a really basic challenge or thought grabs you – like when Ellen Wheeler challenged all of us to come up with stories that would use P&G products. My choice of product turned into an idea that I still want to produce. A place – like the 24 hour laundromat in my NYC neighborhood – can get things going. I think writers need to look around and listen – that’s one of the reasons I don’t wear ear buds and listen to music on the street – or watch TV on my phone – I might miss a good character or setting!

Lynn: Creating storylines for groups of characters in a soap drama involves a lot of planning, organization and development before it even gets to the writing stage. What was your favourite aspect of storylining an idea for a group or for an individual? And conversely, the worst part?

Jill: I love being in a room with a group of writers when someone first mentions a new idea for a storyline or a couple – that moment when everyone stops for a split second to take it in – and then starts talking and tossing their thoughts into the pot. Story stew! I like story boards – using different color markers and squares of paper to lay out days/weeks/months of story. There’s something kind of intoxicating about moving the people and the scenes around, then finally coming up with the day, the week, etc that you’re happy with. I like having the end of the story up there first, so that we know what we’re writing toward. My other favorite job is script editing. It’s a great job. The best part was having the opportunity to assign a day to the right script writer, cheering them on through the week as they write and then, getting a beautiful script handed back to me. I can rewrite a not so good day if I have to – but I get no thrill out of the rewrite. I think I’m kind of good at knowing who’s good at what – who’s funny, who’s heartbreaking, who’s good at killing off characters (really) – and assigning accordingly! My least favorite part of the process is breakdown writing. Glad I had to do it. Don’t like it. Not very good at it.

Lynn: Have you ever had characters that get stuck in your head, demanding their stories to be told? Or had a particular scene becoming very vivid in your head and then have to write it down?

Jill: When you work on a show, the characters live with you and they tend to be a chatty group. If you listen to them, a lot of the story will unfold. Telling a story you love is so uplifting and fun. You can’t wait to get into the meeting, or sit at the computer (or grab your legal pad in my case) or get on the phone with the other writers. It just…bubbles. And when you’re telling a story you don’t believe in – it’s very upsetting. I used to carry on conversations with characters, other writers, the network in my head as I walked to work and I’m sure my facial expressions and mumbling scared a lot of people. Once someone actually stopped me to ask me if I was okay and I blurted. “No! We’re killing Ben today and we’re doing it for all the wrong reasons”. Yikes.

Lynn: What are some favourite pieces of writing advice given to you when you were starting out, that really stuck with you throughout your career?

Jill: Here are a few –
“When you’re writing the emotional/relationship stuff, keep it tight, contained. If the show is long and those scenes take up too much time they will be the first scenes cut and often that means losing the best stuff in the day. Protect those moments”. – From actress/director Lisa Brown

“There is no such thing as a stupid question. Ask the question.” – From producer Mary O’Leary

“Can we tell that story (write that scene) in 9 lines?” – From actress/executive producer Ellen Wheeler

“Don’t tiptoe into your scenes. Walk in, you have the right to be there.” – From writer/producer Claire Labine (when I asked for breakdown writing notes)

Lynn: Following Guiding Light’s cancellation, you had joined up writing for former GL actress, Crystal Chappell’s two-time Daytime Emmy Winner, ‘Venice the Series’ web soap for seasons three and four – and currently fifth season – of the series. What’s it been like switching from writing for a network soap opera to writing for a web platform soap opera?

Jill: Network vs. the web – It’s still serial storytelling, which is the great thing. I love the Venice characters. I’m more of a writer on this show and not part of the rest of the production team, which forces me to use different muscles. I’ve learned to collaborate on the phone, which has always been hard for me! I’m still wrestling with technology and realize how spoiled I was at GL, when I could scribble a scene on a legal pad and stand there looking crazy til Amanda took it away from me and said “That’s okay, Jilly. I’ve got it.” I’m glad our characters can swear and kiss and make love if the story calls for it! I love the freedom, but I miss some of the checks and balances that come with working for the network – they force you to try harder and find different ways to tell the stories you care about. Life is all about picking your battles. When I was on GL and we were answering to both P&G and CBS, we won some important battles, which was great – and we lost some fights that broke our hearts, both as writers and people. I learned a lot from all of those experiences.

Lynn: Are there any other series, either television or web, that you’d love to work on/ work with? Or have you any of your own projects that you’d love to start/continue with?

Jill: We just sent Venice 5 to Crystal and will start the edit as soon as we get her notes this week. I love working with Penelope [Koechl, co-writer] and we have a few ideas we’re discussing. I have to finish my book and there’s another project that needs to be attended to! I don’t think about writing Guiding Light any more – but the Guiding Light actors are so talented and inspiring that whenever I am working on anything, their beautiful faces and voices float through my head. I’d like to write them in very different roles. They are a great rep company. Mostly, I’m looking to tell stories that mean something and work with people I enjoy. That’s the plan. Hey, you made me come up with a plan! Thanks, my friend.

Well, I wish I had a lofty answer, but truth be told, we are sitcom junkies at our house. Modern Family saved our lives this year, along with Frasier, Roseanne and Cosby Show reruns – but sitcoms are serials too – family relationships, overcoming obstacles, love stories! I also love Orange is the New Black, The Good Wife and I think House of Cards is fascinating. Still like Grey’s Anatomy. Catching up on Parenthood, Last Tango in Halifax. I miss Friday Night Lights and Gilmore Girls. I like to think, but I like to laugh and cry and connect when I watch a show.

If you would like to see the interview on Lynn’s blog here it is and a couple of lovely pics to boot of Jill and Lynn in NYC Central Park. http://celtic-dragon.me/2014/08/03/conversation-with-a-storyteller/

THE CREATION SPARK

 My son has Chicken Pox. He is not at school and as I type this, he watches his favourite Lego-themed DVD; ‘Clutch Powers’; Malick The Maligned has stolen  Clutch’s father’s Creation Spark….I feel a blog coming on………….

 Do you have a bank of ideas? A space in your head where your (as yet) unwritten ideas come from? Some writers I work with have a drawer (metaphorical or actual) where their ideas languish until realised on paper. Others don’t sweat it, but rather expect their creative ideas to come whilst doing something entirely different. Usually repetitive, or mundane tasks, like housework or driving, or taking a bath.

 I have worked with writers who must finish one idea in script form, before moving on to the next. The opposite also is true and a lot of writers I help, have more than one idea,  at varying stages of development.

 There is no right or wrong way, to creating, devising, grabbing-out-of-thin-air, dramatic conceits for the screen. But every writer I have come across has their particular way; something pertinent to them, that aids the creative process.

 The urge to tell stories is innate all of us. Some people become more obsessed with the process than others and it is this obsession that separates writers from other people; those that like a good story, but are not concerned about the process of telling one well. The latter is a fixation afflicting all writers I work with. And as a writer myself, I empathise.

 The chances are if you are a writer, that you will spend a disproportionate part of your day observing your life in a removed sense; a part of your brain appraising the view from your car, office or kitchen window as a potential scene opener, or the dialogue you over hear on the bus or in the supermarket check out queue becomes great material for a couple of characters you have been bringing to life. Imagery, snatches of dialogue, smells, sounds and the way these things click together, forms the building bricks of future scripts.

 And the key to getting these disparate, eclectic images and snatches of spoken word into the beginnings of a beginning, are the connections, the correlations and the relationships you find between the various components of your script.

 The narrative: story + plot + subtext; must tie into, weave through and relate to, the visual side of your story; imagery and text work together, counter balancing the narrative, or highlighting aspects of it. Both must be present and both have a specific job to do in the telling of your story.

 Your voice; the essential component of all script writing that is particular only to the creator, provides that vital element of a successful piece of screenwriting – the message. There must be a reason why you wrote this script and this reason must come across subliminally, suggestively, subtly, to your audience. It is your voice, your intent, that comes through in the end.

 Why tell your story in script format in the first place?

I hazard an opinion here, that you want to tell your story in scenes, filmed by a camera and cut together to make a cohesive narrative, because you are an immediate sort of story teller. You like narrative that has a pace, a rhythm, a beat.

 Television writers understand the pr0cussive nature of good story telling. There is always an under tow of momentum in anything worth screen time.

 So the idea has hit home. You need to get this down before it either drives you mad, or goes away entirely.

 * Pitch it to yourself in a couple of pithy, grabby, interesting lines. If the idea has a purpose, a message and a natural shape, it will become apparent here.

 * Then do a quick plot outline. A meets B and C happens. Still hold water? Carry on.

 * Write a treatment. No more that eight pages. Six if you can control yourself that much. Less is more. Here’s my blog on definitive treatment writing for quick reference: https://scriptadvice.wordpress.com/2014/02/12/the-definitive-guide-treatments-for-series-and-serials/

 * Scrivener, Final Draft, or doing it by hand, now you need to plot your character story arcs across your script. I use post-its, or cards stuck on a wall. You will be able to see at glance, where your plot has holes, or where you need to beef up a story line for a character. Points of contact, of cross-over and correlation will now present themselves between your various story lines.

 * Write your script outline. Order your scenes roughly. Using broad strokes, don’t get bogged down in ‘he said then she said’ detail; you will hate yourself and it will be both dull to write and duller to read. This document will highlight the push and pull of your story line; the pace and beat of it. If you find it a good read, then the first draft of your script will reflect this.

 Several drafts later, you have your idea fully realised. From creative spark to full script.

 Take heart; it is impossible for your creative spark to be stolen. The world around you reflects back into the inner eye of the writer; Malick the Maligned, be warned.

 Get help with your creative projects: http://www.scriptadvice.co.uk

STORYLINING; IT’S AN ART

There is nothing as frustrating as those times when, in the story lining process, a meaty, potentially dramatic and resonant storyline is not plotted to the fullest extent of it’s potential, and so what the writer ultimately writes in the script, and what the viewers see on screen, is actually a much tamer, watered down, insipid version of the storyline the producer and the writing team discussed around the table at the Story Conference. And I talk here about long running series and scripts of shows you will know; shows like Holby City, and Coronation Street and EastEnders. These are the shows that I have worked on. But I don’t want you to think that the story lining that shapes the scripts of long running shows like these particular giants is nothing to do with the story lining that you will be faced with when constructing your scripts. Far from it. This craft, this art, is the same knotty bugger you have to face in any dramatic form.

No-one is saying that story lining is easy – or even interesting – it’s not always, sometimes it’s just a hard plotting slog. But in the planning of any drama, be it a single or a series, an un-produced or production script, it is essential that your storylines are plotted properly. Story lining is something writers should do in their sleep. Do it a lot. It will get easier and with experience the obvious beats will slot themselves in place without you even noticing, leaving you to concentrate on digging out the beats in a storyline that are not so obvious, but once discovered, will make all the difference to the original idea.

Each beat of each storyline needs to be worked out carefully. I am not of the school of thought that says ‘sit down and write something and where ever your character takes you that’s the place you’ll end up’ because I for one do not have the patience or the time (and in production both of these things are in very short supply) to dig under a lot of un-necessary, extraneous writing to find the original storyline.

Because believe me, and I say this with a bleeding heart, (having had to steer script editing sessions well into the early hours after a storyline had been allowed to go walk about during the drafting process and ended up infecting a bunch of scripts ready to go to camera) you will write too much, you will veer off the point, you will write yourself into a blind alley if you do not firstly, work out the main and the minor beats in the story line and secondly, work out how this story line impacts and affects the other story lines in your script.

There is a sort of dread that sets in occasionally, from my experience, when you are faced with a white, blank board (I use a wall chart, but insert page or computer screen to make this visual work) when you know you have your character all sorted out nicely, and you know what (vaguely) you want to happen to him/her and you certainly know the best bits of the storyline you’ve conjured up for them, but, there’s those awful stages in between the best bits, that you have to fill in. You have an hour of drama to plot, or even a half hour if it’s a series/soap you are creating/working on/wrestling with.

That’s a ton of story beats and a lot of mini peaks, a whole bunch of shallow troughs and a certain amount of path-picking until you get to the summit – the grand peak of your storyline. And that, (I am sure you will be pleased to read) just about finishes the mountaineering metaphors.

And this is where the skill comes in. This is where the true storyteller comes to the fore; where the teller of tales can shine at the craft of controlling and containing the elements of the story; pulling, teasing-out and revealing the optimum dramatic impact of the narrative.

There are lots of reasons why, between creation and execution, a storyline can fall foul of the production process and ultimately end up a shadow of the original idea, but if you stick to the rule book (there are just a few essentials to remember) when it comes to story lining, your story will not go far wrong and you will find that your story lines naturally weave and loop around and through each other – thus giving your final script a real depth, a fitness, a resonance all of it’s own.

The Basic Rules of Story Lining.

1/ Know your length

Know the natural length of the story line you want to create. Think about it instinctively and you will find you will land on a ball park sort of length. Not all your story lines will need, or be able, to stretch the full length of the 15min, 30min, 60min, 90 min of drama you are writing. Some stories may be short and sweet and best plotted over perhaps only a third of your script, some may feature in the first 2 thirds and be resolved by the last ‘act’ of your script, but in all cases, every story has a natural length and this you need to ascertain from the start.

2/ Know your rank

Decide if this storyline is an A or a B or a minor C storyline and plot it accordingly. An A story is one that can best be described as ‘what the episode is about’ – it’s the central theme, message and forms the internal shape of your script/episode. A B story takes up less script space but is important in that it will have the most impact on and resonance to, the A story. A and B stories run parallel and inter-connect through the script/episode and will influence the majority of the shape of the script. A C story is a minor one, a smaller and shorter story but still important in that it can undercut, contrast too, conflict with, or highlight and augment, the A and B stories. The idea is to get all stories, major and minor, doing a cohesive job together throughout the script.

3/ Look for the detail

Once you’ve got the main beats in place; those moments where the drama literally peaks and the dramatic impact is most intensely felt, then make sure you plot the lesser moments leading up to those dramatic highs. If you fail to carve out the detail of the quieter, subtler, gentler, sub-textual moments in your story line, the over all impact will be lessened and the pay off you are looking for will not happen.

4/ Work the connections

How do your story lines connect? How do they contrast and highlight each other? Look at their separate paths and it will appear obvious at first, the places where your story lines could interconnect and relate to each other. The less obvious moments of interaction and reaction between story lines is your next and more difficult job to identify. How can each story get the best out of itself and the others in the script as a whole? There are cross-over points in all stories and it is those junctions you will need to identify first. Next, plot in the parallel moments of each story line – when you allow your audience the opportunity to see and follow, your separate stories and spend time with each one.

Need help? contact me http://www.scriptadvice.co.uk

DIALOGUE – THE ESSENTIALS

The purpose of dialogue in a drama script may seem obvious; it’s the talking bit – right? Of course. But it is also the hardest part of screen writing to get right. This is because the level of artistry necessary to really deliver credible, engaging, emotionally resonant dialogue is high and not even experienced, commissioned writers get it right all the time.

I have been lucky enough to work with some of the best dialogue writers in the business, which is a curse in a way, because I realise now, after reading scripts on a freelance basis for a number of years, that fantastic dialogue in a screen play is a relatively rare thing.

Dialogue carries a hefty weight in a television script; less so in film. Television is more akin to radio than film, in that respect.

The key to writing dialogue well is to remember that there is a surface job that needs to be done here, via the words your characters speak, but that the subtext to all dialogue is of equal importance.

When it comes to writing dialogue make sure you do not just deliver the surface impact, ensure to go underneath what is said.

There’s lots of advice out there on dialogue and how to write it well for the big and small screen.

So here, I aim circumvent that which is not essential for you to digest, so you don’t bloat out with un-necessary writing-tip calorie. I want you to only wolf down the most essential, most protein-packed morsels of scripty sustenance. So, who’s hungry?

THE PROTEIN PACKED MORSELS OF A DIALOGUE DINNER:

1/ PUSH YOUR TEXT FORWARD:
In a scene, ask yourself: ‘what needs to be said here in order to engage the audience in the plotline? What nugget of information must I get across here?

2/ IDENTIFY YOUR SUBTEXT:
Clarify for yourself, what is the subtext; that which is not said, in each character case. In a scene, ensure you suggest the presence of this subtext by what your character doesn’t say. Remember that actions also speak loudly on screen.

3/ DRIVE WITH MOTIVATION:
Use the motivation of each character to push the pace forward in a scene. What motivates a character to speak as they do, gives energy and adds interest to a scene.

4/ MAKE IT RELEVANT:
The dialogue in a scene must reflect the time, place and timbre of the world you describe. Keep the observations, comments and allusions made by your characters, relevant to both the world of your story and your audience.

5/ DEVELOP YOUR CHARACTERS:
Dialogue adds texture and tone to your characters. What a character says, what motivates them, what they hide, all adds dimension on screen. Remember, a character is on a journey in a script, and their dialogue represents their personal narrative. Keep dialogue pertinent to character. Ask yourself: ‘what do I want the audience to learn about this character; what do they need to learn about themselves, in this scene?’

Listen to how people speak. There is a rhythm, pacing and nuance that comes out in colloquial, flowing dialogue, try to ape this in your writing.

In conversation, people rarely actually sit and listen to a complete speech. We are a race of interrupters. We over-lap, cut short, change direction and repeat ourselves. I would not, however, advocate repetition in dialogue unless it is a character point you are highlighting. On screen repetition is even more irritating than in real life.

Failure plus practise makes screenwriting better. It will never be easy. But your results will be better each time.

There are two main purposes to dialogue in screenplays.

1/ To Push The Story Forward.
2/ To Reveal Character.

Keep those points in mind. Keep practising and if you need help, contact me http://www.scriptadvice.co.uk

IF YOU WANT TO WRITE FOR CINEMA, LEARN TO MULTI-TASK

Welcome writer, director, script guru and all round good fellow, Charles Harris to the Script Advice Blog!

MULTI-TASKING IN CINEMA

Everything in a well-constructed cinema script carries out two, three or even more tasks. There’s no room for slackers on a movie screenplay page. A single line of dialogue may tell a joke, reveal character, move the story on, hint at a possible danger and develop the theme, all in a few words.

Of course, good TV writing has many layers, and there is much overlap between TV and film. However in film this complexity is carried to a much higher level, more consistently.

Concision

You have far less flexibility of time in a cinema script and generally much less screen time to pack in a strong plot, rich characters and deep exploration of theme (to name just three). Compare, say, the film MASH with the TV series (which ended up running longer than the Korean War it was set in).

The movie has to deliver its punch lines faster, with less build-up than the TV show is allowed. It has to find depth in character without weeks or months of familiarity for its audience to rely on.

Most importantly, as with most cinema films, the majority of scenes only last as long as a single dramatic beat. TV script can generally afford fewer sets and so scenes are longer and have more beats in them.

On page 14 of the script for MASH the movie (written by Ring Lardner), Hawkeye finds himself operating with the help of Lieutenant “Dish”. His interest in her has been planted in a previous scene. His eyes linger in her a moment. We cut to outside the operating theatre, where he makes his next move. Here it is, in full:

INT. OPERATING ROOM – NIGHT

Hawkeye and Duke are working together on the last stages of a leg amputation. This time there is no doubt about the surgical process we are watching; we see the almost severed leg and the process of controlling bleeding; then the limb is actually separated from its stump and handed by Duke to a corpsman. Hawkeye speaks to the nurse standing behind him.

HAWKEYE

Hot pack.

Watching her dip the pack into a warm solution and wring it out, he recognizes, despite cap and mask, that it is Lieutenant Dish. His eyes linger on hers for a brief moment.

In the TV series, that scene would have been built on, through further action and dialogue, and combined with one or more of the scenes that follow.

Layering

This means that the movie screenwriter must find ways to layer meaning, without of course confusing or distracting the audience.

In the scene above, we also learn more about the kind of operations being performed, the seriousness of the injuries, Hawkeye’s professionalism, and how he relates to Duke (wordlessly), all in a quarter of a page and two words of dialogue.

This layering means using every means at your disposal: visuals, dramatic tension, plot development, surprise, choice of setting, choice of time (day, night, dusk), non-verbal action, context. And it must be done with a very light touch (no technical instructions or “novelistic” descriptions allowed).

Subtext

In TV of course, beneath what is being said, there is subtext. In movies, beneath the subtext there is deeper subtext.

Good movie dialogue reveals much more through what is not said than what is said. There’s no space for the long ruminating speeches of Coronation Street or Midsomer Murders.

In the second to last scene of The Apartment (Billy Wilder and IAL Diamond) Fran has come back to look for Bud who she rejected earlier. We know that he once tried to commit suicide when rejected in the past, but only shot himself in the knee. As she knocks on his door, she hears what sounds like a gunshot from inside. To her relief, he opens the door, holding a recently uncorked champagne bottle.

She asks, “How’s your knee?”

Think of the levels of subtext in that one line. (It’s also one of the biggest laugh lines in a very funny movie).

Forward movement

When writing cinema, whatever the genre or style, you need to keep things moving forwards at all times. This may mean pushing on the plot, but it also means keeping things moving beneath the plot.

Even a less action-packed movie, such as Almodóvar’s All About My Mother, or Haneke’s Amour must keep the characters evolving, the themes developing.

In the Almodóvar, a small scene about watching a play can bring out emotional depths in the central character. In Amour, the gradual disintegration of a life (and a marriage) is plotted through the minutiae of daily existence and the challenges of age and illness.

In each scene, you have to keep challenging your characters to reveal more about themselves, often in small ways that slip in between the larger “plot” elements.

Your personal voice

If this feels constricting, then maybe you are more suited to forms which give you more space to expand, and less need to multi-task – TV, radio, theatre or the novel.

However when you get into the swing of it, you can find it becomes part of your personal voice.

And as you grow as a multi-tasking writer you discover deeper and richer levels to your voice and begin to bring your own individual take to the precision and multi-layering of the cinema screenplay.

Charles Harris is a writer-director whose film work includes the BBC2 satirical documentary Sex, Drugs and Dinner, with Alexei Sayle, winning Best Network Programme in the UK; and the rite-of-passage movie Paradise Grove, which won Best New Director in Palm Springs. He runs an excellent website for writers http://www.screen-lab.co.uk

NEWSLETTER 16 – THE SPRING ONE

WHAT THE SCRIPT FACTORY SAYS ABOUT SCRIPT ADVICE:

“We can heartily recommend Yvonne’s workshops – she unravels television like no one else! www.scriptfactory.co.uk

Find out if I can help you with your current project@http://www.scriptadvice.co.uk offering writers mentoring, training and script editing services in order to develop their work and talent.  Please pass on this link to your fellow writers. Or you can join SCRIPT ADVICE WRITERS ROOM@http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=237330119115&ref=mf

SAWR is all about writing and writers. Here you can share your thoughts about writing, the creative process, the highs and lows of it all. You can also access this group for information about writing workshops that I am currently running, also script editing and mentoring services that I offer. My expertise lies in Television drama but any writer is welcome to share their experiences and their aspirations here. 

I am on TWITTER here: https://twitter.com/YVONNEGRACE1

Or to see my newsletter online, access my Blog here: https://scriptadvice.wordpress.com/

 * HELLO

* DIALOGUE – THE MAGIC ELEMENT

* USEFUL LINKS

 HELLO

Spring came for a bit, kicked a few crocus bulbs out of her muddy bed, shined wanly over the rooftops and buggered off again. It’s raining here at Script Advice Towers as I type this, the Spring Edition of my Newsletter. It’s the sort of rain that lands daintily on your hair and makes a natural curly haired sort like myself, opt for a coat with a hood – better, in my world, to look like a Hobbit than a woman with pubic hair on her head.

It’s been busy at Script Advice since January. I have been head-bent over your scripts, helped some of you towards stronger next drafts and as Spring rolls on, I hope to help more of you get the most of your current project.

I am also currently writing a book. And it is because of this undertaking, that this Newsletter is a slighter sister to the usual, beefier missives I produced quarterly.

 I hope to be announcing the availability of ‘Television Writing – What You Need To Know’ (catchy it’s not, but essential to say what it does on the tin, I am told) in the near future.  I decided I needed to write a book because although I blog about television writing, give lectures about the various disciplines it involves, and generally make a nuisance of myself on Twitter and on the Script Advice Writers’ Room page on Facebook, where I post links and information about writing in general, I always seem to have something more to say on the subject of crafting drama for a wide audience.

So a book it is then, and one that had to be written. I write from the point of view of a Script Editor, Producer and Executive Producer of tv drama that has rather been around the block and worn out a few t shirts in the process. So you will find it more ‘chatty’ than the usual fair of information heavy books on the market. Watch this space for further info.

 DIALOGUE – THE MAGIC ELEMENT

The Dead Poets’ Society

Visual imagery, music, lighting, camera craft, they all add up to a great script if used properly. The story needs all of these components in order to really leap off the page (not so much music in television, but it does, if used sparingly, add a certain frisson to scripts.) But without a steady, confident, relevant, textured, real, dose of dialogue the script will ultimately fail. Film relies less heavily on dialogue, but the best film scripts in my view, are those that take the theatrical premise that all story begins with character, and all character is lit from within by dialogue.

Here is a beautifully crafted, dialogue-led film script which has the perfect balance of visuals and dialogue. The dialogue is aided by the visual – there is a symbiosis between these two vital screen writing elements. The script is parred down to the essential dialogue; that which exposes subtext at it’s most economical and it is all the more powerful for this. The characters are informed by their subtext, which is in turn, reflected in their dialogue. There is no over-laden emphasis on text here, no ‘on the nose’ observations, the viewer is allowed to put together a picture of each character’s personality and personal drives, by what they say and what they do. Perfect story telling. Perfect dialogue. Screen magic.

THE DEAD POETS’ SOCIETY http://www.dailyscript.com/scripts/dead_poets_final.html

 Last Tango In Halifax

Television now. Episode one of the highly engaging, beautifully crafted serial Last Tango in Halifax. The first scene, as in all television scripts worth their salt, draws you in by the sheer clarity of character observation. Not much is actually said, but the subtext is so solid, so there in the scene, sat under the table as it where, that the merest line spoken by Celia, in reference to her dead husband, drags to the surface decades of resentment and long-buried disappointment. The way the dialogue is paced too, in this small, domestic, but highly portentous scene alerts the audience to the fact that Celia and her daughter Caroline, do not see eye to eye and again, through subtle, but non the less powerful dialogue, we understand in this first, vital scene, that Caroline really does not now, nor ever has, really understood her mother.

All this knowledge is given to the viewer because of the layers of intrinsic understanding the writer clearly has for her characters. This knowledge the  writer shares via her skill in writing just what needs to be said, and marrying this with a deft control of pace, and of attention to small, characterful nuances. So in a 3 minute scene, we can not only see, but also can understand how a frustrated professional mother and daughter (Caroline) relates to her rather meandering, unfocussed, elderly mother (Celia). Dialogue perfection. Magic on the small screen.

LAST TANGO IN HALIFAX:

http://downloads.bbc.co.uk/writersroom/scripts/last-tango-in-halifax-s1-ep1.pdf

 USEFUL LINKS

In my last Newsletter; link here: https://scriptadvice.wordpress.com/2013/01/04/newsletter-15/, I talked about the need to be clear, structured and coherent in your planning of a television drama. I covered treatment writing, plotting your story using an episode outline and also using a beat-sheet or a step by step outline to really nail the dramatic narrative of your script. I do not mention television Bible writing. I am leaving that to Mike Jones.

Originally from Danny Stack’s marvellous blog site, dannystack.blogspot.com/ I have taken this article by Mike Jones who writes here all about how to put together a series bible for television. If you follow this, you won’t go far wrong.

http://www.mikejones.tv/seriesbible

I found this link recently and just love it. Here you can download and read a healthy selection of tv and film scripts. Some have been removed from the site (Casablanca, I was disappointed to realise has been taken down) but most are still there for you to read and study.

http://www.dailyscript.com/

Join me on Facebook at the Script Advice Writers’ Room; http://www.facebook.com/groups/237330119115/ here’s what Phil Gladwin of http://www.screenwritinggoldmine says about it:

‘It’s run by Yvonne Grace, a seasoned BBC producer, and her … incredible energy, passion, and dedication (in true, old school BBC  style) means new links, new resources, and a very nice community  of like minds on a daily basis.’

I hope I can help you with your writing; be it a television script, short or full length film or screen play, treatment or outline, novel or radio play, I read and script edit them all and can definitely help improve yours.  Drop me an email@

Yvonne.grace@scriptadvice.co.uk and let’s get working!

 BYE FOR NOW AND HAPPY WRITING.

 March 2013 – Script Advice. http://www.scriptadvice.co.uk

NEWSLETTER 14

WHAT THE SCRIPT FACTORY SAYS ABOUT SCRIPT ADVICE:

“We can heartily recommend Yvonne’s workshops – she unravels television like no one else!

www.scriptfactory.co.uk

Find out if I can help you with your current project@

http://www.scriptadvice.co.uk offering writers mentoring, training and script editing services in order to develop their work and talent.  Please pass on this link to your fellow writers.

 Or you can join SCRIPT ADVICE WRITERS ROOM

@ http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=237330119115&ref=mf

SAWR is all about writing and writers. Here you can share your thoughts about writing, the creative process, the highs and lows of it all. You can also access this group for information about writing workshops that I am currently running, also script editing and mentoring services that I offer. My expertise lies in Television drama but any writer is welcome to share their experiences and their aspirations here.

 I am on TWITTER here: https://twitter.com/YVONNEGRACE1

Or to see my newsletter online, access my Blog here: https://scriptadvice.wordpress.com/

 AND INTRODUCING MY NEW BLOG; GEORGE, THE BLOGGING WRITER. Read all about her rocky journey towards television writing enlightenment here – http://yvonblog.wordpress.com/

 CONTENTS:

 * HELLO

* ATTENTION PLEASE! (the shortening attention span in tv)

* Interesting Stuff

 HELLO

 We live, here at SCRIPT ADVICE TOWERS, in the highest part of the Sussex Weald. It’s rather lovely a lot of the time, but right now, and seemingly for most of the Summer, my house and garden are sulkily wrapped in a grey damp mist; a grumpy combination of rain and condensation. Added to, no doubt, by the multitude of sighs and groans emitted from the mouths of desultory residents of the Upper Sussex Weald who have (unwillingly) learned to swallow the fact that living in a hilly part of damp Britain means that rain and general moistness ensues on a daily basis. My curly hair is now more pubic than ringlet. Not a good look.

 Onwards.

 ATTENTION PLEASE!

 It’s sometime in the 1970’s and Coronation Street is on the telly. I am approximately 10 years old (my exact age is on a need to know basis) and I have decided I feel sorry for Elsie Tanner. She makes light banter and tries to be brusque and show her harder edge, as she chats with her friend in the room at the back of the Rovers Return. She is waiting on Alan her husband and we all know (my mum, my sisters and me, all watching from the green and grey flocked settee we had for about 30 years) that her feckless husband will come home drunk and not be able to eat his Christmas dinner.

 Except the dialogue doesn’t say this, she just shows this to us by what she choses to talk about instead. Subtle acting. Detailed, closely observed performance generated by true depth of character.

 It is hard to tell, watching the squat black box (tellys were like laquered bricks back then) if the writing informs the acting or the other way round but all I know is that I totally believe in Elsie Tanner and am waiting with a delicious dread for the moment Alan will come lurching through the door of their lurid sitting room set, and a marvellous, passionate, explosive argument will ensue where (I secretly hope) Elsie’s normally laquered hairdo would get messed up as she lobbed an ashtray at Alan’s head.

 Me and my family – like millions of viewers then and still today, were not disappointed. Soaps guarantee that the loyalty of their regular viewers is rewarded with murder, intrigue, betrayal, affairs, robbery and lots of high octane argument. People, after all, are much more interesting when they are behaving badly. And of course one of the main jobs of a long running drama series like Coronation Street and it’s (younger) sisters, is to engage as many people as possible on as many nights as frankly, the Network can get away with ordering from the Production Company. And they order these shows in bulk.

 When I worked on Eastenders, it was transmitted twice a week and just as I had run my Script Editing battery almost down to the last spark, Alan Yentob informed the Production Teams that we were soon to go into factory mode and transmit (and therefore produce) 4 a week. There was of course, a loud and vociferous reaction to this news – how can we make more when there’s only so many hours in the day etc but all complaints were met with stoney silence from ‘Upstairs’ and we of course, got on with the job in hand.

 Looking at the Coronation Street of the 1970’s and comparing it with how the show looks now, there is one glaring difference to my eye. It’s not the absence in 2012 of Rayon, Nylon and backcombing, nor is it the fact that in the ’70’s the sets had a wobbly tendency(production values have increased across the board since those heady days of covering everything in sticky back plastic and hoping the scene struts at the back of The Rover’s Snug would hold out for another recording) no, it’s the length of scene and the amount of dialogue in those scenes. The main difference is, in short, in the writing and the way in which the script is put together.

 Watching an old episode of Coronation Street on my laptop, I am struck by the sheer amount of screen time given to say, Elsie, as she anxiously walks around her living room, touching up her makeup in the mirror over the fireplace, eyeing the un-opened bottle of wine – should she have a glass? No, she’s going to wait. And when she is joined by an astonishingly young looking Emily Bishop, the dialogue is still subtle, cleverly observed, but layered with subtext and comedy. Again, as in the case of the performances, the dialogue is saturated in character. These women sit and talk. And the scene goes on. It’s nearly 5 minutes long. I remember when I was script editing Eastenders, if a scene ran to more than 3 minutes it was unusual. This is because today’s television drama is a much more frenetic creature and our audiences now, although still wanting character, intrigue and emotional voracity, also want action, colour, and things generally going on.

 So the scenes in television drama scripts got shorter over the years and less dialogue was written per scene, less exploration of character is possible and more is made of the text, not the subtext of what we see on screen.

 Our attention span is getting shorter. And as always, Soaps, mirroring the Zeitgeist, reflect this trend.

 As a script editor I waged my own private battle against writing that was ‘too on the nose’. By that I mean too obvious, stating the plotline, describing what you see, and generally being crude and lazy. So phrases like ‘a penny for them?’ and ‘we need to talk’ were banned from the episodes I worked on. Writers had to find other, more character-driven ways to bring out in a scene the fact that a person was clearly not concentrating or that a character had a lot on their mind.

 I believe that audiences don’t like obvious dialogue either. We all love the richness and colour of really good character-driven writing but not all of us are aware of this when watching our favourite Soap, or drama series, we just know when it works, because when it doesn’t, we stop engaging with the people on screen and caring about whether they are going to die, going to marry, going to get rich, get pregnant, get over him/her or not, and turn over.

 Although I owe a lot to Eastenders I have to say Corrie in my view sits heads and shoulders above it and so it is this show I will finish by crediting with a big gold star. The turnaround on this show, the sheer amount of episodes that have to be written, cast, recorded and transmitted in order to meet the rigours of their contracted output, is phenomenal. And still, albeit with shorter scenes, more action than subtext, more big bangs than characterful whimpers, the writing remains subtle, it illuminates character and highlights our humanity and most magnificently, our lack of it.

 INTERESTING STUFF

 LONDON SCREEN WRITERS FESTIVAL – THE SHOW MUST GO ON

Here I am, with Tony McHale (vetern long running drama writer/director/story producer, Tracy Brabin (ex-Corrie actress and now writer of Shamless, Hollyoaks and more) and Damon Rochefort (veteran Corrie Producer/writer) talking about (amongst the gossip and the anecdotal chat!) about Writing For Long Running Drama and how to keep your work fresh and watchable – date for you diary if you havent already bought your ticket: OCTOBER 27th SATURDAY – check out the LSWF website for the schedule and all the other marvellous events.

http://www.londonscreenwritersfestival.com/whats-on/sessions/writing-for-soaps

 FOR A DISCOUNTED TICKET – CLICK ON THE LINK FROM MY WEBSITE AND USE DISCOUNT CODE YVONNEGRACE – http://www.scriptadvice.co.uk

HOW TO GET INTO TELEVISION AND STAY THERE

I did a Breakfast Talk recently for the LONDON SCREENWRITERS FESTIVAL. I have my notes (16 pages in all) available for sale on http://www.paypal.co.uk. My PayPal ID is yvon.grace@btinternet.com and the notes are £7.99. If you want some solid, entertaining, informative pointers as to how to go about this business of television writing, these are the notes you need.

 TV WRITING:

useful website where you can download produced tv scripts. This is great if you need to get your head around layout issues and the general vocabulary screen writers are required to understand and use.

https://sites.google.com/site/tvwriting/

 INK TIP:

An excellent resource for writers – register your script here and keep yourself up to date with products and services aimed at professional writers.

 BRIT WRITERS:

An innovative and go-getting initiative aimed at promoting all writing on all levels. They interviewed me recently and here’s the link to the interview – but have a trawl around too. They run regular writing competitions, with great prizes and a spangly award ceremony coming up in December where rumour has it, Yours Truely may be awarding the Brit Writers Prize for Best Screenwriter 2012.

http://www.britwriters.com/news/from-script-to-screen-yvonne-grace.html

 SCREENWRITERS FRIEND:

A useful list of top notch agents and their submission requirements – some still accept unsolicited work

http://www.jengovey.co.uk/screenwriters_friend/screenwriter_agents_uk.html

 Many of you will either know of, or be a member of SCRIPT ADVICE WRITERS ROOM on FACEBOOK, but if you haven’t yet joined, please do, it is a vibrant lively community of writers, trainers, learners, moaners, growers and doers and I would love to see you there! Here is the link again – so get clicking!

 http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=237330119115&ref=mf

I am always chuffed to get more followers so here’s the link to me on Twitter again:

Tweets by YVONNEGRACE1

 I hope I can help you with your writing; be it a television script, short or full length film or screen play, treatment or outline, novel or radio play, I read and script edit them all and can definitely help improve yours.  Drop me an email@ Yvonne.grace@scriptadvice.co.uk and let’s get working!

 BYE FOR NOW AND HAPPY WRITING.

copyright Yvonne Grace Script Advice www.scriptadvice.co.uk October 2012